Rudy the Rat on “official business”

By Erik Dolson

So, Donnie Boastful tells Ukraine on the phone that it needs to play ball if it wants weapons to defend itself against further Russian aggression. Maybe he’s telling his Russian friends that now would be a good time to throw a little scare into Ukraine, ya know, just to soften them up a little.

The goodfellahs in Donnie Boastful’s not-quite-as-White-House scramble to bury the transcript of that phone call because it smells like a dead fish, it’s got high crimes and misdemeanors spread over it like rancid mayo‘d tuna oozed out from an overstuffed “All About Me” greed roll.

They code the transcript and hide it under the stack of “Classified – Security Clearance Required” papers that sit in the corner that Donnie needs to read to do his job but he never does, because he believes his job is to be DONNIE! and everything else is just a distraction.

So he then sends his personal lawyer — not State Department officials, not diplomats or ambassadors — his own lawyer, Rudy Raat Face, aka Rudy the Rat, to Spain to meet with Ukraine and discuss that little “favor” he referred to on the phone, you know, (whisper it) that Biden investigation…

And Rudy the Rat points out, again, that there’s people over in America that Donnie can tap to work on this end, the attorney general, in fact, Donnie Boastful calls him “My Attorney General” when he’s not calling him “My Bill Barr” when he’s not calling him “Billy the Bat” for the way he beat on that Meuller guy.

Donnie thinks it’s great having his very own attorney general that he doesn’t even have to pay! because Donnie Boastful thinks he’s the most important man in the history of history, and using the Justice Department to smear a political opponent is justified because what hurts Donnie hurts America, because America depends on Donnie, Donnie is America.

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About Erik Dolson

Erik Dolson is a writer living in Oregon

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